a list about sleep and the past 5 days:

  • 6= the average number of hours i have been getting this past week.
  • 10= the number of hours i need to feel non-monstrous.
  • 1=the number of nights the toddler has slept through the night.
  • 1=the number of days the toddler has taken a nap.
  • 3= the average number of cups of coffee being consumed by me.

a list of things i have received in the past week from people i have a). never met in real life or b). just met for the first time:

  • brownies
  • lip balm
  • very special chocolate
  • the most beautiful necklace in the world
  • washable markers (for the kid)
  • gorgeous clothes (for the kid)
  • an annie dillard book
  • the complete sermons of walter brueggemann
  • fair trade chocolate bars
  • hand lotion
  • corduroy book+bear (for the kid)
  • reeses peanut butter cups

and much more, actually. i sense a theme. i believe it is called “i have the nicest internet friends who know i need chocolate”. also, the famous doctor jen came to visit! i was a little starstruck.

a list of pleasant children’s music that both the child and i agree upon to listen to in the car:

a list of coping mechanisms, unedited:

  • crying
  • peppermint mocha creamer (don’t judge, portland people)
  • call the midwife
  • re-reading harry potter and the sorcerer’s stone
  • reading really old O! magazines that i got for .25 cents at the thrift store
  • walking in the leaves
  • being very honest in my prayers


the number of days until the husband comes home:

  • 3.5
  • but who’s counting?

i would dearly love to continue in making lists but it is tedious and i don’t have the brain capacity (or the luxury of a nap time) for any more. sorry.

but: here is an update for all of you who have been holding us up this week:

the husband is still in japan visiting his sister, who was in a car accident. thank you to all who have been in praying. her recovery has been nothing short of miraculous (she is awake, talking, has a sense of humor, got off her ventilator and feeding tube in record time, and is now being prepped to be moved to a rehabilitation center). i can’t thank you enough for your outpouring of prayers and well-wishes, the chocolates and the phone calls. it is truly humbling to watch a miracle take place, and to see how the body of christ responds to carry those who don’t have the strength.

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7 thoughts on “lists

  1. Amy says:

    What I really wanted to send you was a whole season of some tv show on DVD, as that is definitely my favorite method of self-medicating when the husband is gone. But I wasn’t sure what you have already seen!

    That is some good kids’ music, I agree.

  2. Caris Adel says:

    I got chills when I read your update. I can’t even believe it that she’s doing that well. OMW. That’s amazing. So happy for you guys.

    • Caris Adel says:

      A lot of times it’s hard for me to pray and have faith, b/c I always think of the people that do die or don’t get fed, etc. So I always think ‘well God isn’t answering over there, why would he here.” And that can obviously be a problem, and probably isn’t the healthiest spiritual attitude to have when I pray. But, the upside to that, is when stuff like this happens, I’m even more happy and thrilled b/c it’s so unexpected. When I’m not expecting a specific grace, when it comes, I’m more grateful.

      • i totally understand, caris. i think i wrote something about being afraid to really pray for a miracle–because how would i view god if he didn’t answer? this really might be one of the biggest issues we have to wrestle with. but it makes the miracles that much sweeter. i am in shock, actually, about how quickly things turned around. she was very much expected to not make it at all.

      • so glad to hear that your sister in law is recovering. that is such amazing news. and i’ve been thinking too about the variables of prayer and miracles and God’s grace in the world. I don’t think God is in control of everything that happens in the world, but there is power and influence released when we pray and do agree with God’s will and invite God to come and move in the spaces where we otherwise have free-will. i feel like i have a vague enough understanding of why suffering happens (free-will, chaos, powers of darkness, etc) but what i struggle with more is why miracles happen, why the kingdom breaks through sometimes and why sometimes it doesn’t.

      • Caris Adel says:

        “why the kingdom breaks through sometimes and why sometimes it doesn’t.” That is my issue – perfectly stated. I just realized that’s why I’m so annoyed when pastors and church people talk about why is there suffering…..honestly I think that should be a fairly easy answer. The bigger question is why does God seem to be physically absent sometimes, and not at others. Kingdom breaking through – I love that phrase.

  3. charityjill says:

    This is totally random, but I listened to this podcast awhile ago and the panel at one point discussed childrens’ music and how awful it is. Then they recommended some interesting stuff– I guess that there are some ‘real’ bands out there, like “They Might Be Giants,” that also do kids’ albums?

    I just thought I’d share, since I don’t have kids, and therefore this knowledge sits useless in my head.

    This is the podcast:


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